Last Time, on Phenomenal Woman...

When we last left our heroine, she was busy studying to get to Class 5. Since then, she's decided to drop one of the classes in favor of keeping the remaining sanity she has. The other class, she decided to force herself to finish, only with promises from the instructor for help with the portfolio. Yesterday, our heroine had to take a test as part of the class...

Lights fade... We see our heroine walking into a high school library and sitting down at a computer. The test begins, and she almost walks out. She doesn't know how to do this stuff. She's a Mac girl, creative, flexible, spontaneous. She's not a PC girl. She can't restrict her mind to these stiff, boring menus. And then, after 44 minutes of a 50 minute test, something happens. Yes, she's on her last two questions, and something happens. The computer, a PC of course, has a slight glitch, and the proctor informs her that she needs to take the whole test over again.

The second go around, our heroine whips through, finishing all but one question with 22 minutes to spare. That last question is a toughie... She goes through all the menus, trying to find a word or phrase to jog her memory. "Oh, please, she thinks to herself. Let me remember. I only need a 525 to pass." She focuses on her breathing. She calms herself. The clock s...l...o...w..s.... And it hits her. She finishes the last question, submits the answers and waits for her score, crossing her fingers the entire time wait, she's too cool for that. Her score pops up... 882. She earned an 882. And she was worried about a 525?

Now on to the dreaded portfolio.

I SUCK

I'm dropping two of my PD classes and saying "Au revoir" to the $350 I paid to take the two classes. So not only am I wasting the money, but I'm also not going to meet my goal of getting to the next class by January. Damn it! I will be there by June though. Watch out, everyone. I'm getting serious.

Okay, I suck. I know. I disappoint myself sometimes.

Procrastinator

What is my worst habit? I am a procrastinator, through and through. No matter what, I don't kick myself into high gear until the deadline looms. I don't know why this is. I don't know how to discipline myself enough to stop this bad habit.

Right now, I'm supposed to be on Fall Break, but I'm putting together 4 portfolios for the 4 PD classes I'm taking to move to the next Class in pay. What was I thinking taking 4 classes concurrently? I have no idea. If everything works out though, I'll earn my next class move in January. That will boost my income a little.

These portfolios are due October 31, and I knew I had to do them from early June. I don't know what happened. I was keeping up all the way to my trip to Vegas. Then, I just lost the urge to do my work. I took a two month hiatus. What an idiot. I just couldn't motivate myself enough to get back to work.

And that leads me to my desk...when I should be out having a blast. Life is pretty sucky right now.